Well, poo in a pocket...
I had a finely crafted blog going there...
And my blasted computer turned itself off.
Into the fray once more! Into the fray!
If I had a Snowman, this is what it would do:
That's how hot it is in London. I have been wearing an ice pack on my leg tonight, then it melted and I started pouring the water on my stomach to evaporate and cool me off. (You there, stop thinking about my stomach and pay attention.)
When I had my wisdom teeth extracted, I went without painkillers. By the fourth day I said to my mother: "Mummy, please make it stop."
It's like that with the temperatures here. Basta! So they said we'd have a thunderstorm this evening and of course, like clockwork, it didn't happen.
That's how it is with weather in the British Isles. You can be sure that it will be exactly the opposite of what they say. So one day you have an entire nation running in circles to escape the rain, and the next carrying silly big umbrellas in the sunshine.
No, I am not even on the track of what I was saying when I lost the last blog....I was saying that on the other hand, in Texas, when they say it will rain at 6pm, it does - because they have watched the front come down from the Pacific over the past two days and can pinpoint when it will arrive. So you can plan your day accordingly, and be in before the light show.
Also, in Texas, we'd get a week's worth of rain in an hour, whereas in the UK, we get a day's worth in a week. In Texas, it rains like the Dickens, filling up the water table and everything, and then the sun comes out and you wouldn't know anything had happened, apart from the really perked up pine trees. It did that in London once and Lambeth got flooded.
In Britain, it does it half-heartedly, so the weatherman's use of "spits and spots" or "dribs and drabs" is, well, spot on! And then when the clouds do finally decide to cease drizzling on us, they figure they can hang around for another week or so, while they watch us leave the house with umbrellas "just in case", and the weathermen can forecast rain that never happens...
...rather like the hurricane that did happen in 1987. Michael Fish said, "Oh don't be silly, there won't be a hurricane..." and there was one, and we woke up with all the trees lying down, and we never forgave him.
In other news, I walked from Thurloe St (South Kensington), into a couple of galleries at the V&A, then out along Brompton road, all the way up Knightsbridge, through Hyde Park, to Piccadilly, then through to Regent Street. Got myself a pair of linen suit trousers so I can be smart AND cool, then took the bus home.
Tomorrow I shall tell you why I was at Thurloe Street, but today I want you just to enjoy the very English weather rant. :)